For me there was a sinking feeling that came when I realised I had repeated a pattern again. I have had my heart broken so many times. I was a total disaster when it came to relationships. It was that oh f~~k it moment!
I don't know how many times my daughters heard the line "This one's different" when I launched into telling them about my latest relationship, as their eyes rolled back in their heads wondering what unsuitable choice I had made this time.
We all want to love and be loved and we chase after that good feeling, and, when we are insecure, anyone who shows us a degree of interest suddenly becomes the most interesting person ever!
It doesn't come with any discrimination at all, I didn't question whether I actually liked the person for who they are or if they had similar values to me....oh no.....the fact that they found me attractive and were saying all the right things was enough.
I know it sounds so "begging bowl" but believe me until I uncovered this pattern I was grateful for any scraps of love thrown my way and I would think my way into loving people that I didn't even find attractive.
It was the deep yearning to have a meaningful relationship with someone, anyone, that kept me on a search for love. It was also in that chasing of a good feeling that I found myself saying "F##k it, I've done it again".
You see in all of this I was innocently confused that the love from another person towards me was where my sense of security and self esteem laid; as if an external source of affection was how I got to feel good enough in the world.
And then one day in my coach training I came across an understanding that changed everything.
I uncovered and trained in an understanding of the human psychology that transformed my world.
And life changed forever. Yes, I still get moments when I forget and dive into chasing good feelings again but I am no longer scared of feeling the "bad ones" because I know they will pass and won’t consume me and eat me up, and so all of the energy I used to use to avoid feeling is released to do other things. I can identify when I am acting out of my insecurities and taking my thinking seriously and I also have a very deep knowing that whatever happens I will be ok so I spend a lot more time hanging out in a very different way of thinking and seeing the world.
The programme that I have developed, brings all of my training and life experience together so you too can transform your life, your relationships, find love and uncover happiness and peace of mind.
Transformational life coaching: I would love you to realise just how amazing you really are.
This is what a past client had to say about me (blush!!)
I am a fully qualified and insured INLPTA accredited Master Practitioner of Neuro Linguistic Programming (NLP), and a Three Principles based coach (transformational relationship and life coach), working in Bath, Berkhamsted and internationally on-line.
And when I am not doing this-
I live in Bath with my lovely husband who is an artist. I love to cook and bake vegan food and am a bit of a foodie. I enjoy writing and wrote a chapter for a book called ” Thirteen Women, An Anthology” . I wrote for Bath Weekend Magazine for a year as their life coach and am currently writing a book called “Five things to give fewer fu@*s about”. I like observational humour- people like Russell Brand and Tim Minchin. I love the woods, my favourite place to walk and lose myself. Other passions include dancing, music, baking bread, River Cottage, my MX5, being in nature, and fire, I love watching fire. Oh, and I am a Guinness World Record holding Skydiver!
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